Tag Archives: toddler

Ten tell-tale signs you’re the parent of a toddler

I can’t pinpoint exactly when it happened, but at some stage over the last few months something has changed. The gorgeous little man I share my days with has made the transition from babyhood to toddlerdom and the world will never be the same again.

You know you’re the parent of a toddler when…

You no longer have creative control over his outfits for the day – and you’re not sure whether to be impressed or embarrassed by the results.
You long for peace and quiet, but the minute you get it you run to see what he’s up to.
You can recite The Gruffalo (and The Gruffalo’s Child) in its entirety.
Meal times have become a military exercise in dodging increasingly well aimed items of food.
The front room is now a carefully constructed obstacle course littered with small vehicles, balls and strangely shaped building blocks.
A quick walk to the shops involves stopping to say hi to every dog, bench and leaf you pass meaning that a trip that should take half an hour can easily be closer to four.
You have become almost entirely immune to the screams that signal the onset of a potential tantrum, knowing that if you hold your ground it will soon pass. Everyone else just thinks you’re heartless.
You’ve perfected the art of pretending to be asleep in the morning, even whilst someone’s standing on your boobs and physically prising your eyelids open.
You know you should be doing the washing up… but it’s just so cute watching him make his teddy bears talk to each other.
You can differentiate the sound of a motorbike, an aeroplane and a speedboat almost before you hear it. Well you can’t, but he can. And you’re learning, right?

So there you have it: the ten tell-take signs that we’ve entered a whole new world of parenting. But how about you? Do any of these sound familiar – and how else has your toddler made themselves known? I’m sure I’ll have plenty more to add to this list as Arthur fully adapts to his new role, but in the meantime I’d love to hear your thoughts.

An unexpected dip

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Well, I say unexpected. It wasn’t entirely – as we were dashing out of the door I knew that a trip to the beach without Arthur ending up in the sea was unlikely. We were only planning on a bit of a stroll though, a blast of sea air to blow the cobwebs away and break up the monotony of a Sunday where both me and Leigh had way too much work to do.

When we got to St Mary’s Bay, a beach on the other side of Brixham that we don’t visit nearly as often as we should, Arthur was as thrilled as we were by the wide expanse of sand left by the tide. Not quite as thrilled though as he was by the prospect of running towards the waves that were gently crashing in the distance…

It soon became clear that he wasn’t going to be able to resist the lure of the water, and we stripped him down to his vest suit for a paddle.

As as his enthusiasm increased I was glad of the shorts I’d slipped into the bag as an afterthought. This would have been the point at which any sensible parent would have steered the toddler to drier sand further up the beach, but I’ve never been very good at ignoring the call of the sea.

And then moments later, he was in. An errant wave, a little stumble, and Arthur was up to his neck in the water.

It didn’t bother him of course. The water actually wasn’t all that cold, and after the initial surprise of it he was off, flying across the sand.

He was drawn to the stones that lay scattered across the beach, fascinated by the little pools that formed around them where his toes would disappear if he got too close.

It was just what he needed to be honest, just what we all needed – a bit of freedom and mess and a break from playing by the rules.

We did draw the line when it looked like he was going to tackle those waves again. Next time we’ll make sure we’re better prepared, even if it is September…

But for this trip it was time to strip off his soaking wet clothes, attempt to dry him with my jeans and bundle him up in the sling ready for the climb up the steps and back to the car.

We all ended up covered in sand, but there was definitely no sign of those cobwebs.

Word of the week: regroup

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For me and Arthur, the last couple of weeks have been about finding our rhythm again. We’ve done so much this summer, had so many adventures, but now, as the autumn draws in, it’s time to settle back into our little routine.

A big part of this for me has been to get back into the swing of things with writing my novel. I’ve been relieved to find that after a bit of a shaky start the inspiration is now flowing again and I’m loving the challenge of the redraft. As per usual a little bit of organisation and structure, painful as it was to put in place initially, has really helped me use the time I have whilst Arthur naps as efficiently as possible, quickly unlocking my creativity and setting it to work.

But it’s been the time that Arthur’s been awake I’ve loved most of all. I was worried that after a summer surrounded by family and friends he’d struggle to adapt to being only with me – would be bored or lonely. But actually he’s seemed to enjoy it too. We’ve started back at his regular classes this week – music and gymnastics – but other than that we’ve done an awful lot of not very much at all.

It’s been awesome to see just how much he’s grown up over the summer, how his skills and confidence have grown both physically and verbally, how much more an active part of the world he has become. I knew he’d developed loads recently – I managed to capture some of it here – but it’s only been since we’ve had the space and the quiet to just hang out and regroup that I’ve truly appreciated the little boy my baby is becoming.

Twenty months

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Dear Arthur,

Twenty months ago today, you came into the world. That might not seem like a particularly important milestone. I meant to make more of your half birthday – that day in midsummer when you turned eighteen months – but there was just too much going on to stop and reflect.

It’s generally been a summer like that to be honest. We’ve had so many adventures – boating and swimming and camping and exploring. I’ve written about lots of them here, snatching minutes to upload photos and try to capture the things that you’ve been up to. But in focusing on what we’ve been doing I fear I’ve missed some of the most significant things that have happened this summer: the changes that I’ve seen in you, all the ways you’ve grown and developed.

Language has been a really big one. You have so many words! We stopped counting back in June some time, and it was seventy seven then. I reckon it might be double that by now – you’re a brilliant mimic, not only of the words themselves but of the intonation too. It’s not just that though – you can use your words independently as well, naming things and making your requests. You’re so thrilled when we understand you, the glee literally lights up your face.

I think you still understand way more than you can vocalise, and that might be why we’re starting to get some tantrums. That frustration we caught glimpses of when you were younger is showing itself more clearly now. It comes from not being able to get your point across I think, from the world going from making perfect sense to suddenly slipping through your fingers. You are still such wonderful company, but there are times when you seem so unhappy in your skin that I wonder if anything I can say or do will make it better.

It’s times like those I’m really glad I’m still wearing you regularly, still nursing you several times a day. If I hold you close, if we focus back in on that special bond we share, then the angst soon passes. The world is a pretty confusing place after all – it’s totally understandable that there are things that won’t make sense to you.

And despite that closeness being so important sometimes, there’s no doubt that you’re becoming more independent too. You love to sit on your own little chair at your own little table in the kitchen, to shake off my hand whenever you can and wander off by yourself, following your own path.

Sometimes you’ll then decide you want company, but on your terms. You’ll reach up expectantly and say ‘hand?’, mainly to Daddy as you lead him into your world. I know he’s treasured every moment he’s been able to spend with you this summer and he’s going to miss you dreadfully when he goes back to school.

You’ve had lots of different playmates over the summer, and you’ve so enjoyed all the different interactions, particularly with children a few years older than you. It almost makes me sad to watch you mistake strangers for your new friends who we’ve had to say goodbye to for now, to hear you call for Abbie or Fifi in the street, but I know we’ll see them again soon and you’re learning something important about friendship and memory. You’ve had the chance to nurture relationships with family too – with Grampa and Mimi, with your uncles and aunts and cousins. Again you’ll sit and run through their names when they’re not here. I hope you won’t be too lonely when you’re stuck with only me most of the time come September. We have lots of fun things planned though, lots of local friends to catch up with. It’ll be good for you to hang out with children your own age, to start to learn those big skills like sharing and kindness and taking turns.

It’s fascinating to watch your interests and preferences develop. You still love music, your little ukulele guitar but also the piano and the drum. You love to move too – dancing, running, climbing, jumping. You’re still working on that last one – it makes me smile to watch you squat down with such focus in your face and thrust yourself upwards only to find your toes are still in contact with the ground. You will get there soon, I promise.

You’ve had your fair share of scrapes as you’ve found your feet this summer. A succession of firsts that would never have come at all if I’d have had my way: first stubbed toe, first nose bleed, first scraped knee. I guess the bumps and bruises are all part of it though. A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor.

And I think I can safely say that for the most part your world is a happy one. That word itself has become increasingly important to you, it’s become our little ‘I love you’: ‘Happy Arthur, happy daddy, happy mummy’ you’ll say, with a look of pure contentment on your face. You get such joy from the joy of others too: sitting around the table joining in with the laughter of adults at some grown up joke, waiting for a lull before you proclaim it ‘funny’. I don’t know whether you know that will provoke even more laughter, but it invariably does.

There’s so much I haven’t found a way to fit in here. Your love of trains and tractors and anything with wheels. The way you can almost count to ten when the mood takes you but somewhere along the way have got six and seven mixed up with chicken and motorbike. How your perception of crayons is slowly shifting from tasty snack to something to create pictures with, and how I want to frame every one even though I know we’d soon need another house to keep them all.

I have big plans for the autumn, but I’m really looking forward to hanging out with you too. To savouring everything you learn and say and do, and helping you make sense of this crazy world. The memories of summer will carry us through the cooler days and darker nights, and I know you will continue to astound me.

All my love for always,

Mummy xxx

Thank you to Sara at Mum Turned Mom for inspiring this post with her prompt ‘Memories of summer’.

G is for gymnastics

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I loved gymnastics when I was a kid. From balancing on the beam and swinging on the bars to hanging upside down in trees and turning cartwheels on the beach. When I was fourteen I became drawn to trampolining – that sense of freedom multiplied by literally flying through the air. Then in my twenties I found a circus school in East London and took to tumbling. There was lots I had to re-learn, but somersaults and back flips were the perfect antidote to having to grow up.

When we moved down to Devon I was thrilled to discover that there was a gymnastics club in Torquay with classes for adults as well as children. My post-baby body hasn’t quite found the strength or agility to go back to tumbling yet, but it’s been brilliant to build up my trampoline skills again.

Arthur seems to be loving it too. He’s moving up this week from the baby group to be with the other toddlers, and is practising his forward rolls any chance he gets. He seems to get a real thrill from going head over heels – just like his mum.

I think gymnastics is a brilliant skill for kids to learn. It’s just an extension of playing, really – but it brings with it such self-awareness, focus and coordination. I think there’s something about pushing your body beyond its everyday range of movements and using your own body weight to build its strength that’s very empowering – and of course it helps keep you fit and healthy too.

So I hope Arthur continues to enjoy it, and I look forward to rekindling my own gymnastic ability too. I might never quite get back the level of skill I had when I was younger but that’s not going to stop me wanting to try!

Joining in with The Alphabet Photography Project over at PODcast.

Farewell Fun 4 Baby (and the flying duck)

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Last week saw another major milestone for Arthur as we bid farewell to his baby gymnastics class: from this Friday he’ll be with the toddlers taking his skills to another level.

We’ve been going to Fun 4 Baby at Torbay Olympic Gymnastics Club since Arthur was only eight weeks old. I remember his first class well – it was the first group we’d been to together, and by the end he was so exhausted from all the excitement that he fell asleep.

In those early weeks, we focused a lot on getting him to enjoy tummy time. He hated it when we did it at home: would scream from the moment I put him on his front until I rescued him (usually about ten seconds later…). But at baby gym his coach, Mark, propped him up so he could look around, and gradually he got used to the idea.

Arthur loved the sensory area when he was tiny too: the different shaped mirrors that would distort the reflection of the baby he didn’t realise was him yet, and especially the mirror ball which mesmerised him with its sparkle of scattered light.

More than anything else though, Arthur loved the flying duck. A baby bouncer suspended from the rings to double as a swing, he would squeal with delight whenever we put him in it. Since his language and mobility skills have developed he’s toddled over himself, pointing and saying ‘Bird! Bird!’ and only ever reluctantly giving it up for someone else to have a go when his turn was over. The last few times he’s flown in the duck the difficulty of getting him out has been compounded by him being just too big! A sure sign that it’s time to move on…

We’ve really enjoyed baby gym – Arthur’s loved the freedom it’s given him as he’s grown and developed so much, and for me with a childhood spent doing gymnastics and trampolining it’s been great to be back in that environment again. Although there is a basic structure to the sessions, and some clear activities for the children to engage in, I’ve loved that it’s essentially been baby-led – so I’ve been able to watch Arthur grow in confidence and curiosity, branching out and trying new things, and often surprising himself (and me) with what he can do.

I think now though he’s definitely ready for the next level, where there will be more instructions, more challenging equipment and lots more skills to learn. He’s already practising his forward rolls which Mark started teaching him last week: several times I’ve found him in his cot in a downward dog position with his bottom in the air and head tucked under rocking gently and trying to work out how to turn himself over. So whilst it’s farewell to Fun 4 Baby I know there’s going to be lots more fun for both of us as the parent and toddler sessions help him learn and develop even more!

Word of the Week: Happy

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Today the word that sums up the week that was is:

I’m finding Arthur’s language development particularly fascinating at the moment. He’s adding new concrete nouns to his vocabulary everyday, delighted to be able to name things in the world around him. But he’s also beginning to use more abstract words. ‘Love’ was the first one: initially it was his name for a heart, and it still is, but he’s also started to associate it with cuddles and family, even this week linking it together with our names to say ‘love daddy’, ‘love mama’ and mimicking us when we say ‘I love you’. Which we say a lot!

His first adjective was ‘pretty’. He pointed at me when he said it that first time, and has since been using it to describe flowers and the sea and a picture he painted. Then this week he said ‘happy’ – an adjective but also an emotion. And I think he knows what it means. He says it when he’s doing something he loves, often follows it with ‘yeaaaah’, and has begun to precede it with his name. Out of all the considerable cuteness of the words he’s come out with so far, ‘Artur happy’ has to be the most heart-melting of all.

And we certainly have plenty to be happy about! The sun is shining, we’re getting to go swimming outside almost every day, and yesterday Leigh finished his third year of medical school so we have a whole long student summer to look forward to as a family.

We have an epically long to do list to tackle, making up for how hectic things have been whilst Leigh’s been studying. But for the next ten weeks, rather than padding around the house saying his name and looking longingly at the phone in the hope that it will ring and he will hear his voice, Arthur will be able to hang out with his daddy. And that makes him very happy.

Beautiful Bombay Duck

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Father’s day this year coincided with another rather special occasion: the relaunch of my parents’ boat, Bombay Duck, after six months of painstaking work to restore her to her former glory.

The actual launch happened on Saturday, but yesterday we made our way over to meet them at the Salcombe estuary for the inaugural trip to celebrate her restoration.

Arthur was a little bit sceptical at first: he’s been on bigger boats before, but this was his first boat trip where I think he was really aware of what was going on and he found it all a bit peculiar.

He soon got into the swing of things though: testing out the whistle on his life jacket, finding out what all the wheels and buttons did, and generally having a pretty awesome time.

We’d brought Leigh’s fishing kit with us – last year’s birthday present that with everything else that’s been going on hadn’t yet made it out of the house! We didn’t actually catch any fish, but it was good to finally get it out and in the water – and Arthur certainly seemed interested in what daddy was up to…

It was lovely to get to hang out on the water – such a gorgeous afternoon, perfect to fill with family, fun and fresh air. The fresh air did eventually take its toll though, and as we began to head back Arthur started to get very sleepy and just a little bit fractious. Nothing that the sling couldn’t solve of course!

Once the boat was all moored up we made our way back through the woodland, Arthur dozing and the rest of us full of excitement about the watery adventures the summer will hold aboard beautiful Bombay Duck.

Making a toddler activity board

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Over the past couple of weeks, Arthur has become obsessed with hanging things wherever he can manage to get them to stick. It started with his beloved Ukulele – balanced on the edge of a sideboard or hanging from the lamp in the kitchen. The other morning he was very pleased with himself when he hung a bag of nappies on the doorknob, though adding the hat was a little trickier. Now wherever I go around the house there is evidence of this new game he’s invented for himself.

It got me thinking: was there something I could make that would help him practise this new skill, and maybe discover some new ones whilst he was having fun with that? Then I remembered we had some cup hooks kicking around somewhere, and an idea was born.

Toddler Activity Board

You will need:

A rectangular piece of wooden board: ours was 80 x 40 x 2cm
Colourful paper for the background
PVA glue
Metallic or grey paper for the ‘shadows’
Card for templates
Cup hooks
A selection of different coloured felt
Ribbon for hanging

As well as the usual paint brush/sewing kit/basic tools!

Step One

I decided I wanted the background of Arthur’s board to be night and day: we’re still having issues with frequent night waking so this is something we need to discuss with him! Once I’d gathered my range of papers in three colours (blue for day, purple for night and green for the grass), I began by creating this background.

I used standard PVA glue – full strength as a base for sticking then diluted 50-50 with water as a glaze for over the top.

I was pretty pleased with the finished effect – it looked even better when it had dried!

Step Two

Using this background I wanted to create a simple scene using things that are just beginning to be in Arthur’s vocabulary. I decided on a house, the sun, a cat, a tree, an owl, a star and the moon. I drew the shapes on to card, then cut them out to use as templates.

Step Three

I wanted to create ‘shadows’ on the board so that part of the activity became matching shapes. I decided to use gold paper on the ‘day’ side, and silver for ‘night’. Once I’d used the templates to cut out the shapes I used the PVA to fix them in place, remembering to leave space for the cup hooks and hanging shapes.

Step Four

Next came the cup hooks for the key hanging part of the activity. I used a mix of sizes just because that’s what we had – but actually it works quite well to add different levels of difficulty into the activity. I used a hammer and nail to make an initial hole which made screwing in the hooks easy peasy.

Step Five

Once the board itself was completed it was time to make the shapes for hanging. I used the templates to cut these out of felt, embellishing them a little and sewing on a loop of ribbon to each. You could go as far as you like with these, maybe even creating little stuffed shapes if you wanted something more substantial!

Step Six

After checking all the shapes fitted where they were supposed to, it was time to lay them out in front of the board and see what Arthur made of it!

He was definitely quite intrigued, though at the moment he finds hanging the shapes a bit challenging – which is a good thing as it means there’s room to grow!

We also found that the portability of this activity was very handy when the sun came out this afternoon…

So all in all a success I reckon! These are the skills I think this activity board will help Arthur develop:

Fine motor skills (hanging the shapes)
Matching shapes
Naming and developing vocabulary
Understanding night and day

It only took a few hours to make, and that was whilst keeping Arthur entertained too. I’m already thinking about the next one which might end up being a little bit more complicated!

Hanging about in the hood

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After a couple of hectic and exciting weeks away in Cornwall and entertaining visitors here we’ve actually quite enjoyed being at home on our own this week. I’ve had lots of writing and admin to catch up on, and it’s been nice having Brixham to ourselves again now that everyone’s gone home after half term.

On Monday afternoon, as the sun broke through the clouds and Arthur’s patience began to wane after I’d spent far too long at the computer, I thought we’d better get outside.

We didn’t go far – just to the little park on the other side of the coastguard cottages at first, where Arthur was very happy to run around in the grass and enjoy the view. He was looking particularly cute in his new summer cap and I couldn’t help but get a bit snap happy…

He found some daisies, and as usual had to check out how they tasted.

Even more exciting was when he came across a stick: he tried to dress it with his hat, though in the end decided it looked better on his head.

This is my favourite shot I think – contented and a little pensive in the shelter overlooking the pool.

Of course it wasn’t long before he persuaded me to take him down the steps to be a bit closer to the water. The pool was being cleaned (which made me feel better about not having made the effort to get our kit together for an inaugural dip), but as always Arthur loved taking a stroll alongside the mural.

He was inching closer and closer to the sea though, and I soon gave in and took him down to the little beach at the end of the rocks. I don’t think I’ve actually been down there with Arthur before. There’s only really a beach at low tide, and if the wind’s been blowing in the wrong direction it can be a bit of a magnet for rubbish. But Monday afternoon was perfect – lots of sand and gently lapping water. Arthur was in his element.

We didn’t last that long, as once he’d dipped his toes in the water he couldn’t resist sitting down – my reflexes were not quite quick enough so he ended up with a very damp bottom! As we’d been just nipping out I was of course completely unprepared.

There was a bit of protestation as I whipped him up into the sling, but once he was there he was happy just to snuggle up as we strolled back home for supper. A perfect little jaunt, and one which I’m sure we’ll repeat many many times over the summer: just hanging about in the hood.

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Sophie is…

on a journey of (re)discovery in a brave new world.